Waiting for the Party to Start

5-29-09 As I was waiting for the seniors' feast to start last night, I got a chance to chat on Skype with my friend Desi, who is a student missionary in Nairobi, Kenya. We were glad for the opportunity to type to each other, and we talked about stuff. She was very surprised by the fact that I was waiting for a LONG time for the thing to start. One, I've gotten used to it, and, two, it's the last time I had to do it, so yeah. The people setting up the feast kept saying, "It'll start soon, it'll start soon," and every once in a while, something would happen that would herald the soon start of the party. I did something (talk to Desi) while waiting for the party to start. In fact, I got a spiritual application out of it.

Christians are waiting for the Second Coming. That is going to be one massive party, and parties have lots of details that need to be in place before the party can start. God tells us that He'll get us when the party's ready to start, but until then, we must wait. Now, we have two options. We can sit around, do nothing, and gripe about the fact that the party hasn't started yet--but that doesn't put us in the right mindset to enjoy the party. The second option is to do something productive with our time. In the case of me waiting last night, Desi and I were able to talk and encourage one another. In the case of Christians waiting for the Second Coming, we have a job to do, a Commission to fulfill, and we all have different parts to play in the setup. We must use what time we have wisely, and to always live in readiness for the party to start. We must live in such a way that we can lay down whatever we're doing and be ready for the party to start.

For as good as the potato salad and spaghetti and rice and other Marshallese dishes were last night, and as good as it was to say goodbye to the seniors and take pictures and give advice, the party that I want to live in readiness for is the Second Coming. I hope you do, too. :)

Just some thoughts from last night.

More later.

~Ashlee

Summary of A Jam-Packed Week (without Real Jam!)

5-29-09 Today is my last day on Ebeye--and one of the last blogs posted from Ebeye. (I'll be posting perhaps one or two more once I arrive back in the States; I'll let you know when the last post comes.) I feel a combination of glad and sad about leaving. I'm so conflicted about it that I'm happy to grieve.

My class picnic on Monday was attended by freshmen, sophomores, and juniors. It did not exactly go as Jordan and I planned, but the first half went well. (If you really want to know what went wrong, you can email me.) Tuesday was eighth grade graduation. It started only half an hour late (that was good), and then later that evening, they fed us. Wednesday was senior graduation. It started forty minutes late (also a good number), and it was long, but I enjoyed it and took pictures. I most definitely will be posting my pictures (partially to benefit Emily, who had to go home before graduation). On Thursday I went to Shell Island with Megan's class, Alan, Jordan, and John Mark, and had a good time. Then I waited for three hours for the seniors' banquet (which started at 9PM), and then we ate dinner. After that, we went back to the apartments, and the church Yokwe Yokwe'd us. They said nice things and gave us gifts, saying goodbye (especially because three of us are leaving today). Then some of the high school students showed up and did the same thing. I did not get to bed until 12:10 this morning. I will definitely be sleeping on the plane tonight!

Right now I'm running around and trying to get the last minute things I need to do done. There's a lot!!

More later.

~Ashlee

Me Jumping Off a Cement Ship

This is, obviously, me jumping off of the cement ship at Carlos last Friday.

~Ashlee

Kindergarten Graduation and a Trip to Carlos

5-24-09 Wednesday went well. The kids had their final final, then listened to Dr. Kyle talk, and then in the afternoon we had our awards ceremony. I gave five awards out--three for excellent English grades, and two for most improved. All within my tenth grade, of course, but that's okay.

I also went to the Kwaj dock to see Emily off. She left on Wednesday in order to make it home so she could see her brother's high school graduation. We were all supposed to take the 3:15 ferry to Kwaj, but Emily and Lorraine missed it. They came on the 4:30 boat (because there was no water taxis, due to them not having fuel). The highlight of that day was that I had a nice conversation with Jeo, and gave him most of my fries and the drink from the meal I purchased at the dock for dinner. When I got back to the apartments, my room echoed. It was weird. I miss Emily.

Thursday was kindergarten graduation. It was really cute. Their teacher snagged me to be her "official" photographer (and hey! I got ice cream and a brownie out of it!) and so I took pictures for her. They had a little slideshow, Jordan and Alan MC'ed by telling jokes and singing a song, four of the kids recited a little poem about graduating from kindergarten, and then they got awards and such. It was cute.

Friday a group of us went to Carlos. The Kyles went to hold health screenings for the people who live on Carlos, and the rest of us (Landen, Megan, JM, Jordan, Alan, and I) went out to the cement ship. Yes, we were going to jump off it again--and Megan even took pictures of us doing so. I have to get my hands on a copy. It was getting close to high tide, and Megan and Jordan fixed the scaffold ladder. I needed help getting up there again, but it was a lot easier than it was in September. We clambered through the ship and launched off. Very fun. Then we went back to the dock and ate some food, then wandered back to the school where the screenings were taking place. We hung around there for a bit, then came back to the dock, ate some more, and then headed out to the ship again. Now it was high tide, and that meant that the scaffold ladder was closer to the water. Now, either Jordan or I made the suggestion that I should try to get up there without help. So, while Jordan held the thing steady, I went for it. And guess what? I MADE IT UP THERE BY MYSELF! Twice. It was the highlight of my day. (And if you don't remember why, you can go back through my posts and find the Carlos camping trip post, and have fun re-reading. :) ) I also got only slightly burned, and not on my shoulders this time. Just my face. When we came back for vespers, all the kids kept going, "Miss-ah, your face!" And I would be like, "Yes, I know, I'm sun burnt." Much better than two weeks ago when my shoulders got burnt when we went to Bigej.

Yesterday we had the consecration service for the graduating classes. It was basically the church service, but with a lot more people and some extra things added to it. At home, it would be the baccalaureate of graduation weekend. Eighth grade graduation is on Tuesday, and the seniors graduate on Wednesday. My class picnic is on Monday, and I've been invited to come on the seventh grade picnic on Thursday. I haven't decided whether I'll go or not. I do need to pack at some point, since I leave on Friday.

More later.

~Ashlee

Finals and a Yokwe/Yokwe Party

5-19-09 Today we finished up the second day of finals--and I am officially done with the teaching part of being a teacher for this school year! All my tests are over. All my tests have been graded, and all the grades have been put into the grade program, and I've even already turned in my final grades. Some of my kids did well, and others didn't. I feel sort of bad, but it's really up to them whether they study for the test or not. It's weird, knowing that everything is sliding toward the end.

Last night we had a Yokwe/Yokwe party for Lorraine and Emily--since Emily leaves tomorrow, and Lorraine on the 25th. We did the whole "walk in a circle singing a song" thing, and people gave the two of them gifts and we hugged them and people made tiny speeches. I know I'll see Lorraine again, since we plan to have a class together in the fall at Southern, but I don't know if I'll see Emily again. She and I have been Ebeye together since the very start, and now I will have about eight days without her. It will be strange to not have a roommate.

That was after the potluck we had welcoming the guests we now have on the island. Ebeye is currently home to a doctor from Guam and his family. They got in last night and were immediately introduced to Marshallese potlucks. Tomorrow they're going to do health screenings for our kids and participate in a bunch of the things we have planned. They're here for a week, and I hope they enjoy their stay.

I'm off to the apartments--a head cold is trying to attack me, and this is not the best time for me to get sick. So I'm drinking lots of water and making sure I get rest and all that good stuff. So I'm thinking a nap is in order.

More later.

~Ashlee

Two Weeks Left (Although Posted Late Due to a Power Outage)

5-15-09 It's hard to believe that I only have two weeks left.

That's right: two weeks. Two weeks full of activities and packing. I have my last dive for my Advanced Dive class, four final tests to give and grade, fourth quarter final grades to do, textbooks to collect and put away, three graduations to attend (kindergarten, eighth grade, and high school), day trips we're taking to various islands in the atoll (to Carlos and Bigej again!), a picnic with my sophomores to Shell, Yokwe/Yokwe parties to go to, and packing to do. And, yes, I will do all of those things (and enjoy most of them quite thoroughly).

The juniors and seniors threw the teachers a farewell party on Thursday (5-14) night. It only started an hour late (much better than the party they welcomed us at). They fed us in the best Marshallese fashion (spaghetti, potato salad, chicken, rice, and hot dogs). We played some parlor games and then all the teachers were unexpectedly given a chance to say some goodbyes. It was a very good evening.

I really will miss it here. Granted, there are things I don't think I'll miss--but who knows what weird things I'll miss once I'm back in the States? Yes, I miss my kids, and, I think, I will miss teaching (although I will very much enjoy my Introduction to Teaching class in August). But what I think I will miss most of all will be my fellow student missionaries. We're a very small group here, and, for the most part, we've become close. They have seen me at good and bad times, and they have seen me change--and vice versa. I will miss them a lot. That day in two weeks that I'm looking toward is going to be bittersweet.

More later.

~Ashlee

Tidbits and Changes

5/10/09 I have nineteen days from today until the day I leave. Packed into that ever-shrinking amount of time is a whole lot of things that must or need to be accomplished. That list includes school-related things, like making final exams and reviewing students for those exams and sorting books back into the book room, but it also includes non-school-related items, like taking pictures that we haven't taken before (because we didn't want to look touristy), swapping pictures back and forth between computers, and exchanging addresses and such. Interpersonal stuff.

Well, the kids have completely lost it. Since the end of spring break, it's been getting steadily worse. They know that summer's approaching, and they cannot wait to get out of school and back out onto the streets to play all day where they've played after school all year. I feel for our elementary teachers, because the kids have been quite unmanageable--they won't behave OR do their work. My kids have been better, but they keep pushing and pushing and pushing, behavior-wise. Silly children. The rules still apply, even when we're near the end. (Hmm. I wonder if there's a possible spiritual application in that thought. I'll explore that later. Maybe.) Pray for us to keep our sanity and our patience with our kids in the last week of classes, please. We appreciate it!

I have changed a lot this last year. If you've followed my blog during this year, you probably already know that. If you're a reader of the Lake Union Herald, you probably already know that. But the change has been so much more than what I could put into the written--and probably the spoken, also--word. Words are too vague for the depth of the experience, it seems, and that's difficult for someone whose life seems immersed in words. I have tried my best to convey the impressions about Ebeye and lessons about myself that I have gained and learned this year, and I hope that you have enjoyed reading my updates. Some have been boring, probably, and others have probably been too long for the busy lives I know everyone leads, but I hope that the tidbits of news I could pass along have been well received.

Last March and April, I sat in my student missions class, listening, taking notes, etc., The coordinators did a great job--they even got former student missionaries to come and speak to us. I sat there and listened as one SM after another said pretty much the same thing: "I changed so much. It was the best year of my life." And I cynically thought (yes, I am quite capable of cynical thoughts), "Okay. Fine and dandy. I know I'll change. I changed during the other trips I've been on. I'm expecting to change."

Ha. I still didn't know how MUCH I'd change, and about March or so, I realized why all those former SMs seemed to say the same thing: the words are too vague for the depth of the experience. I know I already typed that above, but it's true. I'm pretty sure that, a year from now, I'll BE one of those former SMs who are quite eloquently tongue-tied about their experience. Life isn't about slipping into the role of a missionary from time to time, but about being one. Life isn't about being in foreign missions (because a person can work at home, too), but about not being foreign to missions. (Oh, how I love prepositions!) It's not just a cause to rally around, but a lifestyle to be lived.

Just some thoughts, 'tis all.

More later.

Ashlee

Wait For It

5/5/09 It's already May. I look at that combination of punctuation and numbers and think, "Has it really been almost ten months? Has it really? Is it really that close to me going back? Is it really?" It's a strange mix of emotions that contains both elation and sadness. The mix also includes the anticipation I've had of the end plus surprise that it's really here.

Last Friday we watched an Amazing Facts sermon that was filmed awhile ago at Andrews University. In fact, the first time we watched one, I was psyched to see Pioneer Missionary Church and glimpses of friends who attend Andrews (yay for Carol Lopez!). Pastor Batchelor's sermon was on the 144,000 and on heaven--and it was very, very interesting. I was very blessed by it.

Well, when I wrote the first sentence of this blog post, I immediately thought of that sermon. Why? I may be wrong (since I'm still sorting through the thoughts), but I thought of it because I think that sometimes we approach the Second Coming the same way. Granted, we don't know the date of the Lord's coming, but we do anticipate it. (Well, at least, we should, anyway.) And I have a feeling that when it does happen, we will feel a mixture of emotions: joy, of course, at the fact that we've finally going home; sadness at the fact that some of our loved ones chose not to come (but that's what we have 1000 years to research); but I also think that part of us will think, "Is this really happening? It is. Wow! The world as we knew is over? It is. Wow!" Right now, though, we have to wait, like I have to wait until I leave Ebeye (even though I enjoy it here, I've grown so much). We have to wait for the Second Coming.

HOWEVER, that does not mean that the waiting isn't worth it. It is most definitely worth it! Waiting makes the departure that much sweeter. I haven't reached the time for my departure from Ebeye yet (that's still twenty-five days in the future), but I know that my family and friends are looking forward to seeing me, and I am looking forward to seeing them, and the time in between now and then will make it even better when we do finally meet.

It's the same thing with God. People seem to think--or, at least, act--that God isn't coming back, that He's decided to abandon us to whatever mess we're in and wait for us to destroy ourselves. That's not true--He's just waiting. He knows when He's coming back, even if we don't, and so we wait. It may look like He's not coming, or that He's delayed, but He's not. He's coming on His time, not ours. Plus, the experience we have while we wait make us stronger. Don't they? The waiting time allows for the bonds between us and the One we're waiting for to grow stronger, if we choose to strengthen them. The waiting is part of the experience that deepens our relationship with God.

After all, God says that "[t]hough it tarries, wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not tarry" (Habakkuk 2:3b). Yes, He was speaking of the vision that Habakkuk was writing down, but I'm pretty sure it applies here, too. He says, "Wait for it." He doesn't say how long we'll have to wait, just that we should wait for it. And I suppose that since He said it, we should listen. The time between now and when God does come back to take us home will only make it even better for us for when we finally meet face to face.

Just some random thoughts that the end of the year is bringing to my head, 'tis all.

More later.

Ashlee